It's a crazy time of the semester. Deadlines, submissions, projects, assignments and tests looming one over the other. Sometimes I can't keep track of just what is due when and struggle to knock one down after the other. Its like the shooting games you play. Just when you kill one zombie running towards you there are other two coming from the back and eventually one of them gets to you or you keep up the fight till the end of the level.
When the semester started I had this crazy fear. This panic in my guts that didn't seem to go away as I saw what lay ahead and wondered if I would keep up. Two months have gone by. One day at a time. One step at a time. A blurry countdown. Now it's less than two months away. The end of an era. The book 2 of my life. But I think I am happy. That panic that seemed to loom over me is not there much. Sure, there's more on my plate than I can handle. Coupled with work it's a big surprise I'm not going nuts. Maybe I am.
It's a beautiful day and great weather. And today, I can sit here and appreciate that. A small smile on my face.
Happiness is a funny thing. I've come to believe that the purpose of life is to be happy. And yet everyone has a different answer to "what makes you happy?" How do you chase something when you have no directions? All I know is what clouds over my happiness. And for now I am hoping to fight for light through those clouds. We all do. Some of us find it and others keep looking for it.
Meanwhile, I find my dose of happiness in a cup of coffee. A good movie and a good song. A bright shiny morning and the dozen little things that make me smile through life.
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